Reaching out to women in the SF Bay Area

Paula,  Age 74

This month I rejoined the world of many of you who walk this journey. I departed from a retirement job of 16 years.  Like all things the job and I had changed and I am moving on.  The moments in this separation are bumpy, unexpected and can lead me away from my true self.  It’s probably why I didn’t choose to leave earlier.

Rather than write the storyline, I am reaching out to women who live in the San Francisco Bay Area.  I want to create or join other women or men in a way that will help us all thrive and be happy.  I awoke this morning focused on my curiosity of how to be creative and positive in community.  Please email me if you are interested in joining me.  I welcome your response.

Posted in 70candles, Goals ahead, Looking ahead, Networking, Work life and retirement | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

What’s missing?

Bunny,  Age 70

Today is Sunday. After getting bored with FB I decided to google, ‘Info for women over 70’ and to my surprised you guys appeared.  I am thrilled.
I was born, raised, educated and continue to live in Southern California.  I was married 20 years and have been divorced for 20.  I have two adult children, and four grandchildren ranging in ages 18 – 2. I have one sister and one brother who live close by.  I love them all.  I am a retired educator, and a 10 year breast cancer survivor.
My life: I am on two non-profit advisory boards and two committees at church.  I belong two a book club, and one National Organization.  I have a game night every week with a group of friends and meet with another group of high school friends every three months or so.  I also have a base group that I have been friends with for 40 years or so and a few BFF’s, so why am I feeling like there is something missing?
I am in my bedroom that I have been trying to straighten up for weeks, to no avail.  Books, mail, magazines, clothes everywhere.  It is depressing…
I used to send info out on email regarding community events so much that I was encouraged to start a blog.  I said I would, but…I also started to write a series of travel books for children, but…
Physically, I have diabetes that is under control, high blood pressure that is under control, and I am having a problem with one of my knees. I am also overweight, but have lost 10 lbs in the last 3 weeks, so I am on a roll.  Most people guess that I am in my early 60’s, no wrinkles, no make-up and I just cut my hair and dyed the front blond. A new look for me.
I guess that’s about it. I’m so happy I found you.

Posted in 70candles, About turning 70, Family matters, Networking, Our bodies, our health, Share your story | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments

Freedom in being this age

Peggy,   Age 69

I have been reading your book and feel sad for so many that feel their life is over.  I still work 10 hour days as an OB nurse.  Yes I go home tired but so do my much younger coworkers who have children to take care of.  My boyfriend of ten years and I go country dancing every weekend and we are not the oldest by far.  Several are in their 90’s.  Do we have achey hips, knees?  Sure but we forget because we are having fun.  I go to the gym or walk 5 miles 3-5 days a week.  Do I like looking in the mirror?  It’s an adjustment that’s for sure but some women look worse and some look better.  But my friends and I laugh and joke about how are bodies have changed.  I feel a certain freedom in being my age.  I no longer care what people think.  I hope I embrace 70’s all the way to 80

Posted in 70candles, Goals ahead, Gratitude and Spirituality, HUMOR, Looking ahead, Our bodies, our health, Resilience, Share your story, Work life and retirement | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Moved to Maui

 

 

Ronnee,  Age just 73
Although stories can start at the beginning (birth) mine will start 6 years ago when my husband got sick. No need for details but he died and I looked around and wondered why I was staying in Boston.
I had 2 great teaching jobs but really nothing else. So the year I turned 70 I took a little trip that included Hawaii.
My step son had lived there for over 15 years and he and his wife were so excited about me moving there.
So I went home with a list of what I had to do so I could move the following year.
Again I won’t bore you with the entire list but the first 4 were: job, income and money, health insurance and subletting my rental appt.
just like a pile of dominos EVERYTHING worked, health insurance did put up a few kinks.
Just Quickly: I moved and am living on maui now.
I also made a list of at least 20 things I could do when I moved (so I wouldn’t be bored). As some of your bloggers wrote I was always on the go. a strange thing has happened–I am very comfortable doing very little as long as my brain can stay active. I still feel guilty about this (Jewish Guilt)
I’ll write soon about the difficulties of finding friends.

Posted in 70candles, Family matters, Finances, Resilience, Traveling, Where to live | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments

Feeling sad

Carol,  Almost 70
My name is Carol and I live in upstate New York.  I will be turning 70 June 3rd.  I am bothered by it as I know I do not have a big future anymore.  I am doing a lot of deep thinking and am fearful of all the negative things I have to face at my age.

I am the youngest of three sisters who were always very tight and when I lost my middle sister right on my birthday four years ago it was devastating to me.  My oldest sister is ailing and is 78 years old so my future is staring me in the face every day when I see her.  My husband is a smoker and he also turned 70 in April and refuses to quit.  Always saying “We all have to die of something.”  So I have a terrible fear of losing him because he has been my rock for 34 years and loves me dearly.  I only have one daughter who is turning 50 on Sunday and a mother of a six year old, who is her first and only child.  My granddaughter takes up all of my daughter’s free time so I don’t get to see her often. She had her at 43 so she is her whole life and has very little time for me.

I feel big changes in my memory, my ability to articulate, and seem to not have much motivation.  I want to do so many things but it takes a lot for me to push myself to get started.  I have many interests, hobbies friends, and have faith in God so all of that does help but my problem seems to be believing and living what I know.  In other words I don’t feel positive about much of anything .

I know I am not depressed because I don’t have many of the seven signs and I still push forward daily, take care of myself, my home, my pets, cook for hubby every night but I feel sad allot of the time.  I see the changes in my face and it bothers me as makeup doesn’t seem to do it for me anymore.  I was always told I don’t look my age but I have noticed lately I finally am looking old.  I do not want stay in this place but my sadness seems to linger on.  I am still healthy and have many blessing to be grateful for but still sad.  Alas

Posted in 70candles, About turning 70, Family matters, Our bodies, our health | Tagged , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Not so uplifting or pleasant

Anonymous,  Age 86
Are you interested in the story and comments of an 87-year-old (who retired from her job at 85)?

What if the things I told you were not as uplifting or pleasant as you would like?  For example, I might tell you about women romantic rivals who used my age against me.  Or doctors that are obviously bored with an older woman’s “trivial” symptoms.  How hard it is to make new friends or meet new lovers at 87.  What regrets I have, what I do not regret.

I am dealing quite well, I think, with things like this but would like to know how other women are sorting them out.

Posted in 70 from other perspectives: looking forward and looking back, 70candles, Ageism anecdotes, Work life and retirement | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments

Emerging from winter snows

Susan,  Age 77

I enjoy everyone’s comments…they enrich my vision of myself.  I live in the Colorado mountains and we are just emerging from the winter snows.  Living in a resort is very beautiful but in the winter our lives are limited to snow related events.  I have taught myself to use every type the technology that is available.  I have iPads and iPhones and I watches and electronic books and Netflix etc. etc. etc.  I have come to love these sources of entertainment.  I also have Sirius so that I can listen to NPR and Potus and the BBC.  It’s quite a rich life though I wish I had lots of friends like when one is in college or when you have small children.

 

 

Posted in 70 from other perspectives: looking forward and looking back, Share your story, Technology and contemporary culture, Where to live | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Reclaiming elderhood

Lisbet,  Age 69
I’m thrilled to know about your blog!
I work in a part-time position as Development Director/Community Liaison for www.NeighborsWhoCare.net, a small nonprofit who cares for impoverished elders who still live at home but are isolated, lonely and often depressed. They have fallen through the cracks for social services. That’s how I came upon this blog.

Trained in opera, theatre and dance, I’m a performance artist, writer, teacher of sacred circle dance, practitioner of Zen Shiatsu and Heart Mind Integration Healing (ww.HMIHealing.com), Lover of Life.

Born to a family of wizards, my grandfather was an “American illustrator” who painted glorious canvasses for Saturday Evening Post, among others. My brother was a classical dancer. My dad a hardware salesman. My Mom, now 97 with early stage Alzheimer’s and a live-in caregiver, a Mom.

My son is a 27-year-old Indigo, becoming a Crystal. He has his own wisdom, but he is not yet an elder. I told him early on that he was from a family of wizards; that the muggles would not understand his passionate, outside-the-box nature. He graduates from college in 2 days. He’s jittery, excited, contemplative, wise.

It has long been my contention that we “older people” should be called “Elders,” as in “tribal” or “of the church,” people with experience, knowledge, wisdom, love and compassion to share. “If you call me elderly, I’ll take away your library card!” is my favorite line for making the point.

I feel we need to change the paradigm of eldership.
Stephen Jenkinson does too. He has written “Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul” for death-phobic North America. He runs his Orphan Wisdom School with his wife. They are Canadians.
(www.orphanwisdom.com/shop/die-wise/).

And I will be attending his upcoming 4-day workshop:
“OLD TIME: Learning Elderhood” ~ Rowe Camp & Conference Center
June 9 @ 6:00 pm – June 12 @ 12:00 pm
The Rowe Center, 22 Kings Hwy, Rowe, MA 01367 United States
“Getting older is inevitable. Getting to be an elder is not.”

It’s time we reclaimed elderhood!! Yes, I’m feeling aches and like the tin man, want some oil for my joints. Yes, I gained 8.4 pounds on a 10-day spiritual Ireland tour led by a magnificent spiritual elder who’s spry and was jumping over fences to lead us past cow pastures to sacred Druid sites.
Yes, I’m having the best physical pleasure I have ever had in my life.
Yes, yes, yes! I “flourish” and see the glass as half full. Oh yes, I am “living peace into being” as Thich Nhat Hanh, celebrity Vietnamese Buddhist monk who just suffered a brain aneurism exhorts us to do, through “engaged Buddhism.” We have so much to give and experience and live.

And as Barbara Marx Hubbard says, because of the planetary shift in 2012 we are evolving as a human race. I feel so very blessed to be alive at this moment in time!

Blessed be,
Lisbet

Posted in 70candles, About turning 70, Family matters, Goals ahead, Gratitude and Spirituality, Looking ahead, Our bodies, our health, Resilience, Stories | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A change of heart

Anonymous,  Age 70
I am almost 71, but sadly, can’t say the number out loud. My story might seem to be a sad one, having lost my mother to cancer when she was only 45 and I was 16. My parents were divorced and my step mother wouldn’t take me in so I finished high living with a good friends family. Less than a loving real family, but I went on to college two years later. Didn’t graduate but met a lovely guy who wanted to marry me, so of course I said yes! Everything was good for long enough two have two beautiful boys, two years apart. When they were five and three I was diagnosed with MS and my world started unraveling. I was working in Human Resources for four years when I realized my marriage was not giving me enough love and affection so I fell head over heels in love with a younger co-worker. Of course with no family guidance I asked my very stable but unaffectionate husband for a divorce out of left field. With my family fractured I continued to date my young affectionate boyfriend for three fun years while sharing custody with my ex husband.

Fast forward to being married for 31 years to the younger less stable man who has had affairs, lost almost every job, but for some reason I stay with. I never thought I would live to be 70 which I think factored into all my immature decisions. Now my two sons are 43 and 41. They both became lawyers, got married to sweet southern girls and have given two grandchildren. A boy and a girl from each.

This is where my story gets so happy. I love my grandchildren beyond belief. They have brought me the family I never had and a real reason to live as long as possible. Because of my MS I do not exercise like I should and stay with a husband who really doesn’t deserve me. But yet I can honestly say I am a happier than ever, nicer to everyone than ever and wiser than ever. If I could go back 35 years to rewrite my life, I’m not sure I would. So come on 71, 72, and beyond. It’s a wonderful age!

Posted in 70 from other perspectives: looking forward and looking back, 70candles, Family matters, Looking ahead, Our bodies, our health, Share your story | Tagged , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Personal growth and transformation

Mary Lou,  Age 74

Hi Jane and Ellen,

Since I turned 70 there has been a lot of personal growth and tranformation in my life. Up until the age of 70 I was working part-time in an exciting environment as a sales associate at Monticello, Home of Thomas Jefferson. I had retired here from the Metropolitan area in 2006 and wanted to continue working on a part-time basis. I’ve had good health and it seemed that I had lots of good years ahead.
Just as I was about to turn 70, my youngest son invited me to spend Christmas in Arabia with his family as they had moved to the UAE with the Teach Away Program. I jumped at the chance for a trip of my lifetime. At the time I was beginning to have mobility problems caused by back pain and the orthopedist gave me a cortizone injection so I could fully enjoy the experience. It was an amazing trip!

When I returned home the pain progressed to needing back surgery. The problem wasn’t solved with just the back surgery so I had to go back for a hip replacement in early 2014.

These two surgeries served as a wake-up call that made me realize that life is short and there are no guarantees. Time to do the things I’ve always wanted to try. Another son and his wife traveled with me to Ireland for the most amazing trip back to my heritage land. I had begun art journaling while recovering from the two surgeries and created a watercolor journal of my experiences there. I learned, in my seventies, that I’m a pretty good artist! Another Grandma Moses!!

Another joy and passion I’ve had was to write. There’s was little time to fit writing in when I was raising my family and working a full-time job later in life. It was now or never so I started seriously tackling my story/memoir which I had begun back in the 90’s. I’ve also started a blog and am building a wonderful supportive blogging community (70Candles included). My blog can be reached through www.meinthemiddlewrites.com

Turning 70 has filled me with a zest for life and a desire to experience as much as I can within the ability that I’m able to. I walk a mile a day at least 3 to 4 times a week and try to stay active and connected to my community. I’m volunteering with the local board of aging doing data-entry for the insurance counseling program and also with the local hospital in the gift shop. In many ways I feel free to pursue whatever makes me happy. We’ve spent our lives doing for others and building up some stability and security in our lives. Now it’s time to coast and enjoy the view.

Thanks for this great blog as a vehicle to share a bit of our stories.

Posted in 70candles, About turning 70, Family matters, Goals ahead, Looking ahead, Our bodies, our health, Resilience, Share your story, Traveling, Work life and retirement | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments