Our own Ellen Cole (in the coral jacket) was on a panel in New York, October 4, 2017, organized by The Atlantic.
Watch this discussion about aging in place, or as it evolved, aging in the right place for you.
This topic continues to be a concern of many on our blog.
Let us know what you think.
I admire your honest, thoughtful analysis, as difficult as the process may have been. Good for you and the future you have ahead of you.
Ginger, thank you so much for those kind words. It means a lot to have input from someone who understands. I wish you the best in any decisions you might have to make along these same lines.
This discussion has come at a time in my life where the subject is forefront in my thoughts — thank you Ellen, for participating and sharing the panel discussion. I will soon turn 80 (gasp!) though feel 20 years younger in my head . . . most of the time. Almost four years ago my husband died, and I find I’m still grieving on a number of levels. With the support of family I coped well with the first year of widowhood, doing what had to be done, and in the second year had a number of home improvements made, after which I expected to move forward into life as close as possible to the way it was before the heartbreaking decline of my husband’s health. But then came a number of rather debilitating health issues that doctors have seen as delayed reaction to the unrelenting stress of having been my husband’s 24/7 caregiver for four or five years.
We had 57 very happy years together, which have left me with countless good memories and a deep sense of thankfulness. 30 years ago we designed and built the home I still live in, and I expected to remain here until the end of my own life. However, the health issues have made me less mobile, less involved, less social, less able to keep up with demands of this particular property, and I’ve come to realize that while remaining in this home I’m living in the shadow of a past happy relationship that no longer exists except in memories, and it’s time for a fresh start as “just myself” in a smaller home and different setting with more of a sense of community (but same semi-rural town). Fortunately, I have loving daughters and married grands nearby.
At the moment I find myself swinging from the “OK I’m going to move — I’m ready! Can hardly wait!” mindset, all the way to “Is this the right step to be taking at my age? How can I leave this house?”. But I know without a doubt that if I continue to “age in place” I will continue to stagnate. So there really is no alternative but to choose to “age in the RIGHT place”, which, for me, means making a move — the sooner the better.
I watched the 20+ minute video today and found it well worth the time. Thanks, Ellen, for sharing this. Some very thought provoking ideas were presented by all and the insights the younger panel members shared were so important to acknowledge as we age.
Thanks so much for posting this! So important for all of us ….. all ages! Ellen, my goal is to age in place (with the help of my children) and I agree with you that ‘aging in the right place’ is the best way to look at it. Open communication is so important going forward to keep ourselves plus others in our life informed as things change.
http://www.meinthemiddlewrites.com
I checked out the link but will watch later. One comment: Why such a young moderator? It was odd.
Rosemarie