Moving to Billings

Anonymous, age 69
I found 70candles over a year ago.  I was on the verge of moving from a rural area in Montana to the city of Billings.  It took 3 1/2 yrs to sell my beautiful house inside and out.  But I needed to be in the city.
Before I turned 70… I lived in rural Montana over 16 1/2 years.  I was told by the people who lived in the surrounding area I DID NOT FIT IN THAT AREA.  I tried when I first moved to make friends.  I was emotionally beaten down to the point I became depressed and lonely.
My husband ran his own company for many years, and built a good reputation.  I told him the stories of how I was treated by these women.  Unfortunately he thought it was me, I didn’t give them a chance.  When we first moved to this area no one came forward to welcome us (me) to the area.  Finally 3 1/2 years ago my husband felt my emotional pain, our home was beautiful, large and homey….we had over 200 acres.. Finally we had a positive buyer.
We found a house in Billings. Rumors got out we were moving to Billings and the rumors were horrible… Nothing kind was said, therefore when we left no one said good-bye.
16 years …I felt I’d been in a coma by the time we moved to the city. I studdered for a couple of months feeling fear someone would not accept me…. I’m passed that now my neighbors are friendly everyone waves and say hello. But so far have not met any that do the type projects that I’m into. I’ve accepted that the neighborhood is lovely, and we are close to so many things…grocery dining, shopping. But I’m still by myself. I find myself staying home. And depression is setting in again…the neighbors have all lived here for many years and are established.
I still have fear of rejection.  Before I moved to Montana I’ve always been out-going and friendly. I still have many friends from the state I moved from but over the years some have moved on or travel more, have grandchildren and great grandchildren.
I’m starting quilt classes.  I learned a bit before I moved to the city.  I’m taking classes to get to know people. It feels different making friends at this stage of my life.  I lost a lot of years in rural Montana.  I never really aged backed there, never stepped out of my comfort zone.
I feel like a shrinking Violet.
I so enjoy learning  there other women having similar issues.  I also enjoy reading the stories of women who have matured past my age, and find their life helps me move on.
Thank you all for listening.  I’m fortunate having my husband, even though 7 years older, but healthy.
That helps me move forward.
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