Author unknown
A woman who has crossed 70 & is heading towards 80 was asked what sort of changes she is feeling in herself. She sent the following:
1 After loving my parents, my siblings, my spouse, my children and my friends, I have now started loving myself.
2 I have realized that I am not “Atlas”. The world does not rest on my shoulders.
3 I have stopped bargaining with vegetable & fruit vendors. A few pennies more is not going to break me, but it might help the poor fellow save for his daughter’s school fees.
4 I leave my waitress a big tip. The extra money might bring a smile to her face. She is toiling much harder for a living than I am.
5 I stopped telling the elderly that they’ve already narrated that story many times. The story makes them walk down memory lane & relive their past.
6 I have learned not to correct people even when I know they are wrong. The onus of making everyone perfect is not on me. Peace is more precious than perfection.
7 I give compliments freely & generously. Compliments are a mood enhancer not only for the recipient, but also for me. And a small tip for the recipient of a compliment, never, NEVER turn it down, just say “Thank You.”
8 I have learned not to bother about a crease or a spot on my shirt. Personality speaks louder than appearances.
9 I walk away from people who don’t value me. They might not know my worth, but I do.
10 I remain cool when someone plays dirty to outrun me in the rat race. I am not a rat & neither am I in any race.
11 I am learning not to be embarrassed by my emotions. It’s my emotions that make me human.
12 I have learned that it’s better to drop the ego than to break a relationship. My ego will keep me aloof, whereas with relationships, I will never be alone.
13 I have learned to live each day as if it’s the last. After all, it might be the last.
14 I am doing what makes me happy. I am responsible for my happiness, and I owe it to myself. Happiness is a choice. You can be happy at any time, just choose to be!
Why do we have to wait to be 60 or 70 or 80, why can’t we practice this at any stage and age?
We do prioritize. As sages, we have huge responsibilities. We look back and think about all the behaviors we allowed – active OR passive and try to right them. Our own included. Hopefully, we can laugh at some of our silly ones.
This is a wonderful time of life because our perspective is more clear. One of my areas of interest is social justice. As more of us receive vaccinations, I look forward to more volunteer involvement. It’s a huge privilege to help pay it forward.
Kindness is a theme that strikes a chord. Since my husband died last year I’ve been cocooning. But realize I will need to cultivate new relationships. I’ll try to remember to drop the ego. Also, I’ve been seeing the phrase “love yourself” a lot. What does that mean and how do I do it?
I think it means to do at least one special thing for yourself every day, putting on makeup, jewelry and a lovely dress and going out to dinner every Saturday night, shopping once in awhile for some item that you don’t need but you like it and want it, telling the Lord every morning what you are grateful for, planting flowers or transplanting flowers in your yard, keeping cut flowers in the house, getting a massage every once in awhile, giving away to others what you don’t need or want anymore, and praying every day for others and yourself.
I have had similar changes myself. Especially this last year of home confinement. I have not been able to spend one on one time with my 6 grandchildren or my 3 children. No holidays, no birthdays no graduations no any get togethers except thru zoom or FaceTime. It was the perfect time to reflect on my present life and make the rest of my years on earth meaningful. I have taken the same mindset as the above author I am happier and more at peace. Most things are not a big deal anymore. I am still waiting my turn to get the vaccine…until then and until I take my last breathe “I am a work in progress”.
This meaningful wisdom clearly has application to many of both genders and many ages. I love these 14 beautiful changes in attitude!
Thanks again!
Janet
Thank you, Janet. I turned 80 three days ago, and will write about the transition one of these days. But for now I remain a college professor, and would correct a student who submitted a reference or a quote without a citation. “Anonymous” would be fine, or where she or he found the quote, fine. So we need to be doing that here on 70Candles! At the same time, I agree with your response and that of others that the change in attitudes statements are powerful and wise. I love them.
This is truly aspirational!!! What a wise woman!!!
Wise words…I believe.. if we are lucky enough… to get older…that we want to share our wisdom..everyone will have their own path..but hopefully… kindness, compassion, with life experiences, will help us grow stronger with these… that now we will want to lift up others.. because.. GOD has opened our eyes and given us wisdom to see more clearly…that at any point in our day, we will smile, knowing we made some kind of difference in someone else’s life.. we are in Peace…that our thoughts are for others.. because…of GOD’S Love for us..
I would say this writer is moving into the world of Gerotranscendence! There’s a whole lot of ego, expectations, habits, etc. to release to get to this place. Bravo! So few make it that far and yet it is available to all of us, not just the ‘special’ or extraordinary elder.
I can see much happiness and relief coming from the adoption of these attitudes. For everybody.
Love this… would like a print!
This post has so much wisdom packed into 14 short sentences. Thank you!!