My decision to leave my home

Barbara Mott, now 90

Excerpts from Chapter Two written in her 80’s

While I am now blissfully settled in my new home, it was with much deliberation and soul-searching and almost sleepless nights that I had come to the decision that yes, I needed to make a change. It was definitely time to enter Chapter Two and put some new adventure in my life.

It certainly wasn’t easy. In fact, I changed my mind so many times that people started asking me, “What have you decided this week?” It was an agonizing period that I just couldn’t feel comfortable with. I loved my home. I would look around at all of the familiar things that I treasured and felt so comfortable with, and the idea of selling the house and moving was just too much to even consider. It didn’t help that friends would tell me now beautiful my home was. I thought so, too. Was I doing the right thing even thinking about moving? I had a lovely home, all paid for, no problems with the bills and upkeep, and Nickki and I were very comfortable there. And yet, I felt so alone. No matter where I went with friends, day or night, I always came home to an empty house.

…Assisted living/retirement homes are becoming the popular option for a lot of people my age and even younger. They are springing up all over the country and are a real blessing for people who no longer have the choice or desire to maintain the lifestyle to which they have been accustomed. Maybe it’s poor or failing health, or they have lost a mate, or the home is just getting to be too much to manage. It is a real comfort to know you will be taken care of onsite as your needs arise. Yes, it’s expensive, but so is professional personal home care. The locations are many, and if you look around, you’ll find one that will meet your satisfaction and pocket book.

… It’s amazing how much “stuff” we accumulate over the years that we forget about and don’t even need. But downsizing can be a good thing. It weeds out the excesses. My next door neighbor was planning a garage sale soon, so I gave her the remaining boxes of odds and ends to put in her sale. We were both happy.

THE FUTURE IS NOW
…Maybe if I tell you how much the move has made my life happier, fuller, and more exciting, you may give some thought about how you would feel in a new environment. Here I have the advantage of all sorts of classes: computer, poetry, painting, exercising, Bible study, balance training, walking, writing. And there is often a special appearance of musical talents in the auditorium as well as book reviews and speakers. There’s a beauty shop and barber shop just off the lobby, also. What more could you want?

…Another treat is that I get the newspaper at my door every morning, and my mail is delivered to the mail room and the outgoing mail is taken by the postman. The bags of trash and garbage I set outside my door are quietly carried away. I’ve got to be careful not to get too spoiled.

…All of this information is meant to give you a different perspective of what life can be like if you can make the decision to let go of the past and face a more fulfilling future. I have not been lonely here, and have not had one moment to ponder if I did the right thing. I know I did…I keep pinching myself and wondering how in the world I could be so blessed and fortunate. My future is secure, and it’s nice knowing this is the last move I’ll ever have to make. I hope you can see yourself enjoying the last few years in a similar happy state.